Giving In

Well… After swearing to myself that I wouldn’t be that guy… I ended up being that guy this past weekend. I mean, I kind of feel bad about it, but at the same time it actually felt kind of good.

So, it’s been a while and it’s been something that I’ve been wanting to do or rather, get over with. I mean, it was something that I’ve thought about over and over again and it wasn’t like the time was never right, you know? And it was easy. All I really had to do was just go for it and I would be one and done. So I did. It went down. And boom went the dynamite.

I spent so much time thinking about it, whether or not I should go through with it. So, I spent a couple minutes talking to my friend about it. She said dude how long has it been. Just fucking do it already. Oooookay thanks Nike. Then, after that wonderful pep talk, I mentally prepared myself. Had to psych myself out, you know, so I wouldn’t feel bad or think of a way out or get cold feet when it came down to it.

And so, when it was time, I felt like I just took on the persona of that guy and just didn’t give a fuck in that moment. And what a good moment it was.

When all was said and done, it was like the ‘that guy‘ persona left me and I was like, wow, did I actually just do this? It felt so good and so right in the moment, but after all was said and done, did I really just do this?

Yes, yes I did.

But then what’s going to happen tomorrow? Will it be weird? How long do I wait? Will I have much ragrets?

Like I said, I swore to myself that I wouldn’t be that guy anymore, but this past weekend, it was like, I knew that I wanted it, so, I just went for it.


And so, my new camera arrived today – I swore to myself I wouldn’t be that guy that took random pictures of random things and pretended that they were the shit but in actuality it was pretty plain and was totally just shit. And I’m not even claiming to be an amateur photographer or anything, but I’ve had these ideas for a project portfolio for the longest time and I’ve been on the fence on whether or not I wanted to invest in a camera for photography. And I think spending the day at the Del Mar Fair kind of gave me more of a reason to buy the camera. I thought about it for a long time and, like I said, there really wasn’t a ‘right’ time to do it, all I had to do was just go for it and boom, I’d be one and done, and all I had to do was wait for my camera to arrive. It felt good actually, to press that ‘buy’ button. Like real good.

So now I am a proud owner of a Canon something something with 50x zoom and wifi and all these knick nacks and shit with a manual that has like 500 pages because of other languages and what not. AND I had to wait 2.5 hours for the battery to charge – which I don’t understand why they didn’t send me a battery that had some charge like other electronic devices (ie. like when I got my iPhone). I also hope I don’t have regrets tomorrow (no ragerts haha) on my ‘investment’. But damn, I still feel kinda bad. I swear I won’t turn into one of those pretentious douches though haha. And I’ve really had this great idea for a portfolio for the longest time and, like I’ve been saying, if I think about doing something, I should do it (or simply put, think it, do it, as my friend would say, conveniently shortening my personal mantra haha).

I’m really excited to share my project here on my blog – so stay tuned!

Also, get your mind out of the gutter Image result for emoji laugh



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