Some of the best ideas usually come when you are just able to sit and think: like being on the can. Which is where I came up with this – a Throwback Thursday blog! I admit that I do this on Instagram, but sometimes there are just some throwbacks that mean something to you that pictures just don’t do it justice.
I remember my freshman year, second quarter at CSULA. I was my first day in history class and I distinctly remember my teacher looking like a real life Santa Claus: he was rotund, had a long white beard, white hair, wore glasses and suspenders. I sat in the back so I could look out for any cuties that were in my class (hey don’t judge). So, class starts and 5 minutes in this girl walks in late. She was wearing these overall shorts and had her hair in braided pig tails (is that even a thing? sorry I don’t know these terms). She was ok, as I made a mental note of my attraction to her.She apologizes to the teacher for being late and looks around the room for an empty seat. There are a ton of empty seats actually, but she started walking down the aisle adjacent to mine and didn’t stop walking. Passed the first seat. Then the second seat. Finally, she decides to take a seat next to me right in the back.
Word? I didn’t really think anything of it at the time though. 30 minutes in, the teacher utters the dreaded words “Ok, so now I want you to find a partner and exchange numbers and/or email addresses so if you are ever absent you can find out what happened in class”. I lingered for a couple seconds and looked to my left – no one. Damn. Looked to my right and she turns to me, smiles and says “Hi! I’m A, nice to meet you”. (her name will be ‘A‘ from now on). I said hi back and we exchanged numbers and email addresses. Surprisingly we hit it off quite well. We both had the same impression of our teacher and were talking about it for the rest of the 15 minutes of class. I don’t really remember what happened after that, but I just made a new friend, so that was nice.
One day while in the dorms, my roomate from across the hall knocks on my door and says ‘there’s a girl here for you’. I was like, “What? What girl?” and they just kept dogging me so I got up and went to the living room and there was A standing at the door. She came by to see if I needed the homework that I missed in class that one time I didn’t go. I said sure and she gave it to me. Don’t really remember much after that either, just looking back on it now, I should’ve known that she liked me… which, being the oblivious dumb ass I was, didn’t realize that when a girl from your class just ‘happens’ to ‘find’ the exact dorm you live in and ‘gives you homework’ you missed in class, was code for, “Hey dumb ass, I like you, I found out where you live by stalking you and I just needed an excuse to come over and see you“. Well, you live and you learn, right?
Sometime after that, I started working on campus at the Juice It Up (kind of like a hand me down Jamba Juice). One day, she comes in with her friend while I was working and we start chatting, you know, like old friends, since it wasn’t really busy that day. I told her to come by later on when I get off so I can give her a free drink. So, she and her friend come by later on in the night (think I got off at 7) and I make her and her friend a drink and we sit in the store just talking about nothing. Looking back on it now, she probably brought her friend there to see what she thought of me… (Even writing this I am cringing at how stupidly oblivious I was…).
Some time passes and she comes by the store again. I forget, but I think she asked me if I wanted to get dinner after work… yeah it was probably her that asked me… so I said sure. She comes back after work and we go to Popeye’s of all places. So, we walk in, she orders and I order and she tries to pay but I don’t let her. I insist on paying for the meal and we stand there arguing for a couple seconds and I just force the cashier dude to take my money. Ok, see, here’s the thing – I am the type to pay for the very first outing, be it between friends or dating, if it’s just the two of us, I always choose to pay first. With that said, and looking back on it now, she probably thought since I paid it was a date… we sit, talk and eat our food. No awkward silence or anything, just awesome fried chicken between friends. At least, I thought we were just friends…
Then… we had a ‘day date’ (which I realize now) where we just had nothing to do the whole day (no class, no homework) and just decided to hang out and explore Alhambra/Downtown Arcadia. We drove around in her van (yes I remember it clear as day, it was one of those oldie early 90’s vans and was red), went to random shops, had ice cream and just spent the day together. I did not think anything else of it. I swear. Ok, another thing, I have always had girl friends (girl as friends), more so than guys, so this was nothing out of the ordinary for me. But, as is the unfortunate trend, looking back on it now, it probably meant something to her.
And that was the last I saw her. We went home for winter break and the day after Christmas, I looked at my Facebook and noticed she deleted me. I was like, maybe she deleted her Facebook? So I looked her up and she was there… she had deleted me. Being the naive dumbass I was, I friended her again but didn’t ask why she deleted me. She accepted and then deleted me a week later. Wow. I did try to connect with her again after I left CSULA, but I guess she was mad at me. Back then I didn’t know, but now I understand why. Which sucks because I honestly thought we were just good friends. I mean she was awesome, but I wasn’t attracted to her in that way, at the time. Now, she lives in the state and city that I want to eventually move to. Does that mean something? Will there be a part II of this? Only time will tell. I do hope to be going to graduate school there next Fall though… 😀