“Being Alone”

*** So I came across this post randomly on a dating forum. I don’t really know why exactly I clicked it (or what I was even doing on a dating forum), but after reading it, I felt like it left some sort of lasting impression on me. I thought, “Huh… maybe my motivations belie a deeper reason as to why I’m on this ‘crusade’ to find someone…“. Perhaps he’s right. Perhaps my true motivation is to fill the huge void that was left behind when… yeah. I mean not necessarily a romantic void, much more a ‘best friend’ void. Oh well. Anyway, just thought I’d share it because I thought it was an interesting look into one of the main reasons why people date. Or it could also be one of the main reasons why people seek lasting friendships. This post is from a gentleman named Richard ***


E1Many years ago I had been dating this woman for a little while and I was curious as to why she continued to go out with me, so I asked her … I was sort of hoping she would say I was funny or nice or kind or even cute … Instead she said it was because I “listened to her stories” … I remember at the time thinking to myself “That’s it? That’s why she goes out with me?” .. I was disappointed, because as I mentioned, I was looking for a somewhat more dramatic reason … But now, years later, I realize what she meant … I realize it because it now leaves one so empty if no one cares what you think or feel, if your opinion is not valued by anyone … And likewise, if you have no one who confides in you, well, that too leaves a void, a feeling like you have something to offer but no one who wants to draw on the empathy you can offer … So, that’s what I think is the worst aspect of being alone, that there is no one there with whom you can intimately exchange your “stories” … Now, I know God is there and there are many charitable ways to scratch this itch and help others in need, but I’m just talking about that basic human need to share an intimate mind-connection with someone on a one-on-one basis …Someone to listen to your stories …”

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